Create the Life You Would be Devastated to Have Not Lived

Think Big Dreams, Dudette

It’s your choice

You are in control of how big or small you dream. Did you know?


Did you know that you really can make your dreams a reality?

Scary, huh?

Dreaming big dreams at the risk of people judging you, doubting you.

Dreaming big dreams at the risk of you doubting yourself.

What if I claim this big life that I have dreamed up, only to not get there? That would certainly feel worse than living where I am at now, right? Yeah, I don't think I could handle that loss. I'm just going to do my thing the way I've been doing it.

We all make that choice. Over and over. One way or the other.

It is something I have battled with for many years. Not so much the fear of failure, but fear of the grief I would feel at the loss of the dream. But, I've realized 2 things.

1. Gratitude is everything. Dreaming big dreams and wanting more, does not mean I am unhappy or ungrateful in the life I'm living. It just means I am feeling called for more. It means I know I meant for more, and that if I choose and work for it, I can get it.

2. It comes down to one question: What are the things that would absolutely devastate me if I did not do them? I came across this prompt while reading one of Katrina Ruth's, many mind-blowing blog posts.

Would it devastate me to have tried and failed? To have reached for that big dream, even if, for whatever reason, it didn't quite live up to the dream. Even if that dream changed and changed again.

It has occurred to me in that way that hits you deep in your bones that NO, I will never be devastated by the notion of trying and failing. Of my life not working out exactly how I envision it now.

I would, however, be DEVASTATED if I reached the end of my life and had never given myself the chance to play big. To push myself further every single day. To strive for growth every day. To lean into joy every day. But, most importantly, if I never got over my own BULLSHIT and just took action on my dreams. If I never said yes to the vision inside my head and just, full force, went for it. No matter what people thought or what my own fear gremlin tried to warn me of. #fuckyoufeargremlin

That would absolutely devastate me.

Mind fucking blown wide open.

It’s Your Life to Live, so what will you choose?

I have only one life and I am in control of how I want to live it. So, I can choose to live from fear or I can choose to be bigger than my fears. I can CHOOSE to trust in myself, in my power, and in my dreams.

I am CHOOSING and DECIDING this now.

Will there be times I doubt myself and question my sanity? Duh. Human over here.

Am I strong enough to do the work and come back to what really matters? Yes. I am.

I know that now.

I always have been.

And, so are you.

You have the power within you to do whatever the fuck your heart desires. You really do.

Will it be easy? Absolutely fucking not, but yes at the same time. Because you are doing it because you can't imagine not. You are doing it for you and for all those that you are going to inspire by making that choice.

By acknowledging that your dreams are real, and valid, and important, you are claiming them. When you really DECIDE that you are committed to them, for no other reason then that you would be devastated if you didn't try your hardest to get there, you are making them a destination in your mind. They are no longer a dream, they are an outcome.

An outcome of your choices and actions.

I really believe this.

It's so easy to get caught up in the time you've wasted not working towards your dreams. But, everything you've been through to this point has been a necessary and important part of the journey that has gotten you to this moment and this realization. You would not be who you are and where you are without the lessons you've been dealt. You are ready to own your shit now because of all the times you've said no to doing the work, allowing your bullshit to get in the way of you being your most badassiest self.

Feel gratitude for all of those moments, all those lessons, and all that time. Now, let it go and get on with it.

You never have to be yesterday again.
— Kyle Cease

All that matters is that who you are now is ready to make it happen for you.

All that matters is that you are saying yes NOW to your dreams and to yourself.

Let's also be clear here, dreams do not have to be associated with a career if that is not what jives with what's inside of you. Your dreams are your own and fuck what anyone else has to say about it.

Your dreams are what comes to mind when you allow yourself, without judgment for yourself and without apprehension, to think of what you REALLY want. What comes to mind?

A family of 4 and some chickens? Amazing.

A mansion on the coast of Spain? Amazing.

Living in a van with the freedom to roam as you please? Amazing.

There is no wrong answer. Anyone who judges your dreams is simply triggered by your ability to own and express them. There I said it. They just don't understand and, you know what? They really don't have to. They are not the ones who will have to live with not having strived for them.

Be a Dreamer

The dreamers are my peoples.

I didn't really know this until recently actually but that’s what happens when you decide to get out of your own way. You start to see yourself for who you really are and who you want to be. You start to let go of the shit that doesn't really matter but that you've carried around with you for YEARS.

To go after your dreams is one of the most courageous things you will ever do. I freaking love you for it. For every single small, medium, or big action you take towards it is so fucking amazing!

I hope you know that. I hope you understand how amazing you are.

Because you are.

You are AMAZING for being brave enough to choose your dreams. Big or small.

What would DEVASTATE you if you did not do it? (Man Katrina Ruth just wisdom bombs me on the daily)

I bet you can think of more than one thing. Are you, in some way, doing or working towards those things every day?

What are you doing in place of those things?

Seriously, write a list. It will blow your mind.

My list looks something like this:

1. Take every opportunity I am given and can create, to see the world. To go on BIG adventures.

2. Be in nature.

3. Write a book.

4. Value and deepen the connection with myself.

5. Go on meditation/yoga retreat

6. Surprise my partner with a trip.

7. Build a business that I love and that supports my happiness, my freedom aligned lifestyle, and my family.

8. Help first-time authors publish their books and bring their writing to the world.

9. Work 1:1 with a coach.

10. Get sponsored by and write for a travel publication.

11. Be grateful for the moments as they are.

12. Meet/surround myself with soul-aligned people that push and inspire me to be the best version of myself.

13. Do something that scares me everyday.

14. Honour the body that I am in.

15. Have a positive impact on the world.

This list, which I am sure will be fine-tuned and changed over time, has become a guiding light for me of sorts throughout my day.

Anything I do, I pause, and ask myself if it really matters. Is this contributing to creating the life I would be DEVASTATED not to live?

It will blow your mind how quickly this can shift your mindset.

It’s never too late, until it is.
— Katrina Ruth

You get to create your life. You get to choose how you spend your days, your weeks, your months, and your years. At the end of your life, there will be no one but YOU that will be responsible for how you spent it. It is your CHOICE. Now, and always.

Intense, I know. But, that's just what I'm vibing with today and this is truly what I believe. What I've always believed.

Will you be devastated if you don't do the thing? Will you regret it? Then fucking do the thing. There will be no one but yourself to blame if you do not.

P.S PEP talking myself here too. You are not alone. We all need reminders.

So, what would DEVASTATE you to not have done more of in your life? Or, at all?

Are you doing it?


Life is the adventure, you can define it however you'd like.