Reminder: No One (Who Matters) Wants You To Fail

Pep Talk Time

No one wants you to fail.

Let me clarify, no one that matters wants you to fail.

There will always be someone who will take their shit out on you but who cares about those people. Seriously, they are not showing up for themselves, or the world, so I am far from interested in their opinion.

If you’re not in the arena getting your butt kicked too, I’m not interested in your feedback.
— Brene Brown

Your success, because you are a good person, is going to improve your life, and in turn the world. You are not doing yourself any favours by playing small. So, quit letting your fear keep you down. Show up every day and do the thing you said you were going to do. It’s important.

Shush The Fear Gremlins

This is a new pep talk I’ve begun to give myself. Everyday. Sometimes twice a day. Ok, every other hour.

Adventure.png

Fear can show up in so many ways. For me, it’s anxiety and defensiveness. So, whenever I feel myself getting in a tizzy about failing, or being judged, or feeling inadequate, I take a big ol’ breath and give myself a “quit that” pep talk.  

I’ve been giving myself a lot of pep talks lately.

The creation and launch of this blog was a long time coming and involved me overcoming some serious limiting beliefs about the way I want to, or can, show up in the world. The fear of judgement gremlin was ringing in loud and clear.

What if no one resonates with what I have to say? Or, worse, what if no one cares what I have to say?

And then, I remembered a story my partner, Mik, told me once.

It involves a wise hypnotist, a high school auditorium, and a very nervous public speaker.

Mik, as a bright-eyed high school student, decided to become an elected member of his school council(nerd alert). One of his tasks involved speaking in front of an auditorium full of high school students and announcing a visiting hypnotist (Let’s call him Mr. Hypnotic)

High School Mik is not excited about this task, in fact, he is extremely nervous. While they are backstage getting ready, the hypnotist noticing Mik’s anxiety pulls him aside and tells him there is nothing to worry about. Easier said than done Mr. Hypnotic. Noticing that Mik was not put at ease by this chillax sentiment he provides this gentle but powerful reminder:

Just remember, everyone out there wants you to succeed.
— Mr. Hypnotic (Auditorium Hypnotist)

MIC DROP 

Ummmmm, thank you Mr. Hypnotic! Seriously, thank you.

This message has stayed with Mik until now, and, honestly, it’s going to linger with me in equal measure.

How right is Mr. Hypnotic? So. Freaking. Right.

Anytime someone puts themselves in a vulnerable position, where they risk being criticized, I am always hoping beyond hope that they are successful. Cheering as loud as I can.

Seriously, if you ever need a personal cheering section, I’m your girl. You flipping got this!

So, if it’s so easy for me to show up for everyone else, maybe that means that someone will be there to cheer me on? Duh, Steph.

Find People To Support Your Pep Talk

Let me tell you, showing up for yourself and doing something vulnerable will only highlight the number of people out there waiting to support you. If you’ve curated your relationships well, it will feel like the world is rising to celebrate your win. You might even be shocked at who shows up for you.

And if they don’t, you will meet people who do. Get creative.

I’ve found support in the form of coaching programs, facebook groups, podcasts, and youtube mentors. It can look however is best for you, and in whatever form is going to help you get there and get your butt in gear.

Whether they be in human form, in your earbuds, or on your laptop, surrounding yourself with people who inspire you to be all you can be and who are there when you fall short will change the way you approach your every day and the way you live your life.

As a lifelong people pleaser, I learnt very early that the world consists of, in the words of my father, Energy Suckers and Energy Givers. There is great power in curating your relationships so that you surround yourself with more energy givers than suckers. Make the conscious choice to surround yourself with people that elevate you.

Not everyone should have a front row seat to your movie.
— Sheri Salata

If successful, you will launch a blog and be overwhelmed by the unsolicited and unconditional love and support that comes your way. Take that Fear of Judgement gremlin.

So, do yourself, and the world, a favour and write that article, or take that picture, or apply for that job. We all want to see you crush it.

It will inspire us to do the same.

And, just remember, there will always be something “scary” to overcome, and there will always be a way to overcome it. Just enter every situation with the gumption that you are the type of person that takes action, and that sees things through until the end. You have kicked the butt of so many other things in your life, why not this?